August 16th, 2009

i slack, i slack?

Well perhaps not - it’s just been a painful (literally and figuratively) mess of months.   In attempt to find some ritual peace, quiet, mental and physical well-being, I thought it a good idea to attend a yoga class about which friends were raving in December.

There-in the pain began.   Long story short about the disc tears and bulge.  Long story long about the medications that gave me panic attacks and twitching arms and tics, long crying jags, and physical therapists who just might as well have been labeled physical sadists.   It took me a long time to find the course that seems right for the healing - which i think I’m about halfway through.   And I don’t know where the psyche heals in all this.

Being in chronic constant horrible crying jag chronic pain made me realize how much I get out of doing my art and having my art done - because I couldn’t.  I missed a trip to Cornell for the Alumni Playwrights Weekend reading of my play Out of Orbit,  I missed a trip to North Carolina for the premiere of my play fisssshhhh.  I haven’t seen a play in 7 months because I can’t sit comfortably to get through the evening.   Somewhere I feel like I’ve lost the compass for my soul,  I’ve lost me.

Even now, I’m partway back.   Not all the way back.  Every outing is considered in how much pain it might cost me.   I feel like I’ve lost a lot of independence. My social world has dwindled, my ability to keep on top of my work and my submissions has dwindled.  Any  and all efforts regarding writing really had to go into the the making money kind of writing - so I’ve become a pitching maven - but man is it weird to tell the development exec “no , I can’t sit on your couch or you’ll have to haul me out in pieces”  while hoping the pain meds don’t cause too much memory loss.

And it kills me to look back on the last six months and say “what? what have I done?”

I’ve worked on healing.   I’ve lain staring at the ceiling.  I’ve swum.  I’ve trusted my body to those to be trusted and those not to be trusted.  I’ve given up.  I’ve gone on.  I’ve now an empathy for those who live in daily pain I hope I never take for granted again.   What didn’t kill me makes me stronger - or so I hear.

I can’t imagine this won’t all find its way into my next play - or the one after that.  Stay tuned.

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November 21st, 2008

just sitting back and eating bon bons

realizing that it has been a freaking year since I’ve posted which makes me think, what the hell have I been doing since that last post last november?  Or perhaps what the hell do you think I’ve been doing since that last post last november?  Perhaps I care too much what people think but…

we moved -  there, there’s that time suck right there.

worked on a blog about my daughter’s Harry Potter obsession.
WGA went on strike - and although allowed to playwright during that time period, the psyche appeared to be striking along with the walking around in circles.

I co-created, co-wrote, co-produced a web series for strike.tv.  Note To Self: never let film crew into apartment again, as lovely and talented as they were.

Shot, went to visit sister in London and Scotland (must get some UK productions Universe please), came back, edited (rather, watched our editor edit in her editing bedroom suite), rewrote There or Here and The Last Seder as it went into production at EST LA- Project.  Then went to New York for the premiere of There or Here at the Hypothetical Theatre,  swung back in the middle for the first day of first grade, did the happy dance over the New York Times review,  the lament over the economy and lack of synchronicity not allowing us to move the play and returned to LA to rewrite a screenplay and work on pitches and begin the scribbles of something that may be a play and may not be and launced the web series on Strike.Tv just in time for Obama to win the election.

Oh, and on Thursday I will once again make turkey for 20 people.

still, there are things I would like to get done before the end of the year

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November 21st, 2008

It’s not a play but…

My newest production is launching into the world in a much bigger arena.

Faux Baby - created by Rachel Leventhal, Laura Brennan and myself  and airing on

www.strike.tv/fauxbaby
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8a78kjh6sd8
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November 29th, 2007

…and now what?

The waiting game of theatre.   The play is finally done.  Well not done because it’s never done done, but done-production-ready-done which means the playwright is ready to go into rehearsal to make whatever last tweaks/changes that there are to be made.   OK  - so I had a read of There or Here at PTNJ and the consensus has been reached of the play is production ready.   So now what?

I wait, I send it out,  I ask other people to send it out, I pray to the theatre gods, I watch The Secret on youtube forty-bazillion times (I actually don’t but perhaps I should), and I wonder how to make the ball start rolling…where will the personal tipping point happen.   Because for me - it ain’t done til it’s up on the stage.

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July 19th, 2007

land of cracked bells…

Writing from Playpenn in Philadelphia, land of brotherly love, humidity and play development. Working with the lovely and talented Michelle Volansky who is no longer a signature on the bottom of letters from theatres to me, and Amy Feinberg and graciously allowing us to co-exist with her in her house with her husband and two children. We are now calling it the Big Love House as we balance the precarious Mommy/Theatre Artist balance dance. Had a looong conversation with Emily Morse about that yesterday… we aspire to a theatre where all parents can work with childcare and no guilt. Does it help that Julia is singing songs from Annie?

First time Amy and I have actually worked together and it’s going really really well. Nice.

Working on THERE OR HERE - good work getting done I think. Laying in some clarifications in the play. Late nights… rewriting in my dreams and in the now-rainbow-script (todays pages are goldenrod). Getting a deep admiration for Paul Meshegian who put this whole thing together…

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July 1st, 2007

it flies away…

birds opened last night - packed house, beautiful production - one of the few times I’ve really felt the design of a play of mine elevating and illuminating the text to the next level, the last scenes finally worked (rewriting up through previews, always nerve-wracking)…photos to come…homeward bound.

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June 30th, 2007

opening night….

off to the opening night of birds at Rorschach shortly… -  a “challenging” week to say the least but it’s an incredible production team, kick-ass design team, fabulous actors.  I can’t believe I’ve been here a week - a blur of rehearsals, previews and rewriting.   And I can’t believe I’m going tomorrow but the play continues on….always find that strange, how my presence is so not essential to that part of the process.  Strange good and strange weird….

Tired - but good tired….

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June 19th, 2007

there and here for THERE OR HERE

So casting is finally complete (spit three times so the theatre demons won’t cackle at my expense) for THERE OR HERE  at Playpenn in Philadelphia this summer.  This has been such a challenge - and I find myself wondering how we spread word for things before the internet?  Here I am writing a play that needs three East Indian actors (and my questions about myself writing a play that requires three East Indian actors are endless - is this a stupid move?  is this a savvy move?  who the hell am I to write a play about this?  how can I write about someone who I am not?  But I am always who I am not when I am writing.  Aren’t there hordes of East Indian actors dying to play a part written for them rather than just another minor role or begging someone to see that an actor of color can play anything (and why can’t I find them?) so says the white jewish girl from long island who has never has a jewish actress for the lead in what she likes to call her “big jew play”  The Last Seder.)

OK - I digress.   So we are cast - finally - for the workshop in Philly and I want to give major major kudos and large amounts of respect for Paul Meshejian who opted to choose this play, knowing casting would be a challenge.  I can’t wait to get started and meet everyone.

As for THERE OR HERE here - Sundance did an AMAZING reading that Philip Himberg directed in one short afternoon. Kind of one of those - wow, first reading and the play is working revelation readings - a nice audience, all theatre fans (and film agent).  Grateful on all accounts for those who kicked ass that day  - Marin Hinkle, Bernie White, Purva Bedi,  Viji Nathan, Aly Mawjii, Beth Ruscio, and the serendiptious theatre gods that pointed all directions to Purva (two mentions and then PlayPenn’s Paul Meshejian seeing her across the crowded room at the Pacific Playwrights Festival at South Coast Rep and saying “if she can act, we’ve found our Neera”.   There are so many ways there is magic in theatre and this is one of them - finding the right actors for a play and then having them take it to a whole other level.

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June 19th, 2007

twenty (well seven) questions

check out the interview on the Rorschach theatre blog.

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June 18th, 2007

about to take flight….

Sunday I fly off to DC for tech rehearsals and dress and opening for birds. I got the first taste a couple of weeks ago at the first readthrough and first few rehearsals. God, I love working with Wendy (McClellan) - brilliant at asking the right questions and a director I trust. I can’t always leave the process and not be nervous about what some director is doing to my play, but her I’m not nervous about, I just can’t wait to get back to see it. The space - an old church - is an inspiration (ok, lacking in air-conditioning but an inspiration) and the set - wow. Look at a drawing by Jake Muehlausen - brilliant designer.

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